Monday, July 27, 2009

Things you shouldn't hear in sexual identity therapy

We are often asked how sexual identity therapy is different than reorientation therapy and gay affirmative therapy. Here are some things you might hear in either one of those two approaches, but should not hear in SIT.

To heal homosexuality, one must relive past wounds.

Same-sex attracted people are touch deprived, so you need to receive healthy touch in therapy in order to change.

Homosexuality is a gender identity disorder.

You were born gay and you should accept that as who you are.

Experts agree that people are gay because ______.

Anyone can completely be free of homosexual attractions if they are motivated.

If you are attracted to the same sex, you are not trusting God enough.

Coming out of the closet is the only way to be really well-adjusted.

Your religion is homophobic and heterosexist, you should consider changing your church.


Feel free to post other sayings you should not hear in sexual identity therapy.

4 Comments:

Blogger Bose said...

How about:

If you emerge from this therapy choosing to be openly gay, I, as your therapist, will be disappointed or consider therapy to have failed.

Other professional, credentialed therapists can not to be trusted as much as those who are like me when it comes to sexual identity issues.

If you have compounding mental health issues (depression, anxiety, OCD, bipolar), sexual identity issues must be treated first. (And/or) resolving sexual issues usually fixes all other mental health problems. (And/or) drug therapy for depression, etc. never works. (And/or) drug therapy is contrary to God's will.

Openly gay people have chosen sex over God.

4:08 PM, July 27, 2009  
Anonymous Warren Throckmorton said...

Steve - you are on target. These are things you should never hear...

12:25 AM, July 28, 2009  
Anonymous Fg68at said...

Youre are sexually abused? This is (surley, strongly) one cause for your same sex attraction. (Its a specific of "heal")

Homosexuality is a lifestyle. Gay persons life the unique gay lifestyle. A gay person can only life a unique gay lifestyle or change. (From conservative and mostly from religios people i became the feeling that i have to choose their "lifestyle" or a "gay lifestyle" (promiscuity, sex on the open street, etc.) There are many propagated lifestyles, some are in a group mainstream, some are not, there is diversity. But the stated "homosexual lifestyle" is only one with tight narrows. I learned similar before my coming out, before i had information. Partnership is with a women. With a men you can fu** around. You should to fu** around. When you cross the border you are a outlaw. The (heterosexual) world await that you fu** around. You are no more bound to limits. And this with the feeling of opening a pressure cooker at the coming out.)

When you life a "homosexual lifestyle" (whatever this is, i think celibat is also a homosexual lifestyle) you can not have a long partnership.

"religion is homophobic, change church" The religion propably not. But i think it can sometimes help to change the church, when it is so antigay that there is a pressure to therapy or many false "statistics" or lies about homosexuals. And this can begin with Miles McPherson. See URL.

7:05 PM, July 31, 2009  
Blogger Joshua Johanson said...

It is impossible for gay people to have a happy fulfilling marriage with an opposite-sex spouse. (From the Iowa Supreme Court decision)

You will never have as happy and fulfilling of a relationship with your current spouse and you could have with a same-sex partner.

Gay people can never really fulfill an opposite-sex spouse's sexual needs.

Gay people can't really control their sexual actions.

9:18 PM, November 17, 2009  

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